Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Six months later: THIS IS THE POST SCRIPT

Mary's adopted father, Ralph Kidman, has died.

Ralph had arranged a trust fund which would continue to provide an income for his ex wife, Mary's adopted mother Sue Kidman.  

He never did tell Mary the names of her birth parents, but Ralph's wife found the information in an old chocolate box in a toolbox in the shed when she was selling the house to move to a small flat. 

Mary and I contacted her birth parents.

Her father said,  'Water under the bridge.  Too long ago. Not interested.'  He  explained,  'We had been married for six years.  The pregnancy was unplanned, unwanted.  Ralph and Sue wanted a baby.  We shifted when my wife became pregnant.  Sue was a bit of a blabber mouth so we purposely lost touch with your family.  We didn't tell her that it was our baby.  There is no point in meeting.  You are an adult.  You have always been provided for.  You have no reason to complain.'


Mary said,  'My adopted mother may be a bit scatty but she is a decent caring human being.  I was very lucky that the three of you all moved out of my life.
I'll put you on the "People that I don't need to know list" and we will move on with our very pleasant lives.'


So, I was very proud of the way that Mary handled the rather unpleasant meeting and that is the end of this post script. 

Monday, November 5, 2012

Mary's birth parents

I tracked down Mary's adopted father, or rather, I found his new wife.  I asked her did she know Mary, a relative of mine.  She knew immediately who I meant so I felt free to ask her to pass on a letter announcing Mary's wedding.

She was quite friendly and said, 'I will pass it on but he probably wouldn't go to the wedding.  It won't be because I cause trouble though.  I have always told him that he should see Mary.  It's unkind not to see her.'

So I told her that Mary had only recently discovered that she was adopted and it seems that Mary's adopted father is the only one who knows the names of Mary's birth parents because one of them was a friend of his.  So all we have to do is wait and see if the names are forthcoming. 



Sunday, February 27, 2011

Money for the dogs

Feb. 27th, 2011.  I have just landed me a job for the year.  Early morning dog walking.  An hour each morning, five days a week.  I have to pick up two young Jack Russells at seven thirty and have them back at eight thirty.  I have to include twenty minutes of dog training during the walk time.  They have already been trained.  It is just to keep their training in shape.  In mind, so to speak.  See how we go.  The people value their dogs.  They're paying me well.  I have to dog sit about four  times a year when they go away for the week end.  I have to dog sit in their house.

I think that I have enough money saved to see me out for  the first two years of study, after that I'll have to earn some more.  But this job will give me some money for entertainment.  The other is for rent and food.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Franklin (Dane) - Study - Occupational Theropy, toss it all in for Mary

Feb. 24, 2011.  This is my first year as a mature age student and I will be studying Occupational Therapy.


JOURNAL:

Part 1 - I'm starting this journal in the hope that I can get things straight in my mind by writing it down. It won't be a formal journal with dates and everything. It will just be me talking to myself and trying to make sense of my life.

My name is Dane Franklin Kidman. This is the story (true story) of how our lives were very nearly wrecked by my Aunty Sue. She always means well but she doesn't think things through. Aunty Sue is Mary's mother.



My mother, Faith, is Sue's twin sister, not identical twins, in fact, they don't look anything alike. Mum takes after her Dad, strong and reliably sensible, and Sue is even more scatty than her mother, scatty but well meaning and sort of lovable. We all tend to look after her, and boy, does she sometimes need looking after. 


My Uncle Ralph took off with an extremely businesslike older woman after ten years of marriage to Sue. I can sort of understand him leaving, except for the fact that he also left my cousin Mary in the lurch and she was only four. Mary hasn't seen her father since he left but money wise, he has always provided for his family. My cousin Mary is nothing like anyone else in the family.


My problem is that Mary and I are related on both sides of the family. Our mothers are twins as I said before, and just to further complicate things, our fathers are first cousins.


I am in love with Mary and although marriage between cousins is legal in England, it would be asking for trouble if we were to marry because the relationship is just too close. So this is why I have moved away from Mary and purposely lost touch. I have dated other girls but nothing serious and nothing for a long time now. Mary has never had even a casual boyfriend until now. Mary and I have only ever been just friends but although I have never told her how I feel I am convinced that she loves me too.


It was becoming unbearable seeing her every day. I thought that she might meet some one else if I was out of the way.


It looks like she has met someone else and I don't know how I can stand it.


When I left home I started a blog but when Mary made a comment I realised the blog wasn't such a good idea so after two posts I stopped because Mary needs to be free of me if she is going to move on and have a life.


I haven't looked at my blog since the second entry but evidently my mother looks at it sometimes just in case I have added something. I speak to Mum and Dad at least once a week and yesterday Mum mentioned that Mary had made a new comment on the blog. So I copied out the posts and the comments from Mary because I need to think about things.


Mary is going to marry a fellow who is already seeing other women. Fred Window visited my mother and told her that Clive had been seen in two different venues, both times he was drapped all over a girl and it wasn't even the same girl so he won't be much chop as a husband. Mum wants me to come home to save Mary from marrying this chap. She also asked me how I felt about Mary and because she asked me a direct question I just blurted it all out, how I have loved Mary as far back as I can remembered but realised it wasn't a suitable relationship. Mum said that she had an idea and asked me to ring her back every night while she worked on her idea. She thinks that we might be able to stop the marriage but she says that she won't say anything else until she has worked things out, so I agreed to ring every night while she works on her idea. Mum says that way I will be available to help her if needed.

I don't have a phone so I will have to phone Mum.

THIS IS A COPY OF THE BLOG AND THE COMMENTS:

Franklin - first year of study - O.T.

This is mainly for my own benefit and will probably only be of interest to relatives and close friends. But for me it will just be notes to remind me in later years what this study time was like. I expect to enjoy most of it.

Thursday, February 24, 2011


Post 1:  This is my first year as a mature age student and I will be studying Occupational Therapy.

Posted by franklin at 3:20 AM

2 comments:




    Hi cousin. Your mum told me that you had finally put something on your blog. She didn't tell me that it was just one sentence though. I see you are using your second name, the maiden name of our mothers. It is all very well for you but you should try being female and stuck with Franklin as a second name. I'd change it except mum would be a bit sad, so I can't. Have fun at uni.
    Reply
    To who ever might be interested! Mary's comment could be a bit confusing if you don't know our family history. Mary's mother and my mother are sisters, twin sisters and our fathers are related to each other. They are cousins. Guess what! Mary and I are definitely never getting married, at least not to each other. Just so as you know.
    Reply



Sunday, February 27, 2011

Money for the dogs 

JOURNAL:

Part 2 -  I have just landed me a job for the year.  Early morning dog walking.  An hour each morning, five days a week.  I have to pick up two young Jack Russells at seven thirty and have them back at eight thirty.  I have to include twenty minutes of dog training during the walk time.  They have already been trained.  It is just to keep their training in shape.  In mind, so to speak.  See how we go.  The people value their dogs.  They're paying me well.  I have to dog sit about four  times a year when they go away for the week end.  I have to dog sit in their house.

I think that I have enough money saved to see me out for  the first two years of study, after that I'll have to earn some more.  But this job will give me some money for entertainment.  The other is for rent and food.


2 comments:


    The dogs will help keep you exercised. Did I tell you that Jay is pregnant again.  We have to stop bike riding soon and start walking. Jay's doctor said that falling off a bike and landing on the handlebars would not be good for the baby.
    Reply
    Please note the date. You probably won't read this as you never blog. Hi “EX” cousin. As neither I nor our mutual friends have heard from you since more than eleven months ago, due to neglect I have decided to write you off as a cousin and a friend so I won't be inviting you to my wedding.  By the way, Jay and Fred had a little girl.
    Reply
________________________________________________


JOURNAL:

Post 3:  Saturday Feb 4.  2012.  My mother told me about her conversation with her twin, my Aunty Sue. Mum said to Sue,I told you it was a mistake not to give Mary all the detailes of her birth. You are wrecking her life Sue. Do you know what this Clive fellow is like? The creep that Mary is going to marry? He is already carrying on with two different women. You have to tell her. I think you will find that Mary will be happy to know. Tell her. She has the right to know.”


It turns out that Sue had a big secret that she had sworn Mum not to tell to anyone in our generation.


When she realised how important it could be for her daughter and her nephew, Aunty Sue released her twin from the promise of silence. 


Then my mother proceeded to tell me the best news that I have ever heard. It turns out that my Mary was not related on both sides of the family, Mary was my adopted cousin Mary. No blood relation. Aunty Sue was embarrassed that she was unable to have a baby.  Her embarrassment nearly cost us our happiness.  


Aunty Sue always manages to cause trouble.  She means well but this one was really thoughtless as Mary had the right to know that she was adopted.  Sue is not my favourite person right now.  Sue says that she doesn't know who the birth parents are but she thinks that Ralph knows.  So I'm going to try and find Ralph.  


I found a reliable friend to take over the dog minding, donated my few sticks of furniture to the next occupant of the student flat, threw all my gear into a huge backpack and managed to catch the last train home.


The next day the courtship began. I'm still working on it but at least I now have some hope. Mary is still cross with me for not keeping in touch. I explained that I had been staying out of her life so that she could meet some one else without me breathing down their necks. Staying out of touch with Mary was the hardest thing that I have ever done. I think she is beginning to forgive me. 


At least that Clive fellow was right out of the picture even before I came home. I have Mum and Fred Window to thank for that.


I won't be returning to uni. Why would I when Mary lives in the next street. We both have access via a gate through our back fence. The gate is always open. Even when we were babies and only just walking we could play together. This has been the longest eleven and a bit months in my whole life.


Don't be surprised if this is the end of my Journal. I intend living my life now. It beats writing about it.


In fact, as far as this journal goes …...... THE END.

HOLD ON!  I might find Mary's birth parents.  If I do then this might not quite be the end.


Possibly there will be a Post Script. 


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